"Debi, will you marry me?" Charlie Pendergast was down on one knee by the table, holding up the ring box, the glint of the one-carat diamond inside.

Debi Sullivan didn't know what to say. She glanced around at the other diners in the expensive restaurant and felt an embarrassing blush come over her. "Uh..."

Charlie's smile faltered. Debi immediately felt sorry for him and didn't want him to face public ridicule.

"You've caught me off guard!" she blurted. "I'm thrilled - really I am. But I don't want to answer you tonight. Not here. I'm too shy. I'll give you my answer in the morning, okay?"

The other diners turned away in disappointment. Charlie got up and nodded, his lips set in a thin line. He slipped the case back into his pocket and sat down. "Sorry if I embarrassed you," he mumbled.

"Oh, no! It was sweet. Really!" She tried to make it up to him. She did love him. They'd been together for three years now. Mostly. Theirs had been an on-again, off-again relationship. She loved the way he treated her - like a princess. And he had money. She could envision herself being well taken care of.

Except in the bedroom.

Debi sighed, thinking about the last time they had made love. It was more than a week ago, despite his efforts to seduce her. He had climaxed quickly, of course, but she had been left wanting. It wasn't his fault, she knew. He often came too soon. Not to mention that his penis ... well, it just didn't do it for her. It was small and thin. He couldn't help it. Was she so shallow that something like that could matter?

Her mind flashed back to her last boyfriend, Ben. God! Now there was a magnificent specimen of a tall, muscular man with a big cock! He worked out regularly and she felt so feminine and delicate standing next to him. She always came with him - thundering orgasms that made her lose her mind. Too bad he was such a jerk out of bed! He was annoyingly egotistical and treated her cavalierly when they were out together, like he was doing her a favor. In a way, she guessed he was. That was why she had broken up with him and gone back to Charlie.

Of course, that wasn't entirely true, was it?

There had been a few times when she had called up Ben just for a quick fuck. It always made her feel guilty. Ben would have that little smirk in his voice, as if he knew she couldn't stay away. He never rejected her, even if he was dating other women at the time. Ben never seemed to be the kind of man who settled down.

"Sure, you can come over," he'd say. "I guess you aren't getting what you need from Charlie, huh?" Oh yeah - he knew about Charlie. Although she had never told him Charlie's "shortcomings," she figured Ben had guessed. He would laugh and make her feel guilty - but not so guilty that she would cancel her tryst. They had an animalistic attraction - she couldn't deny it. Ben was an itch she needed to scratch. The idea of being married to Charlie would mean she'd have to give him up and she wasn't sure she could see herself being in a sex-deprived marriage for the rest of her life.

Charlie didn't give her that visceral sexual thrill that men like Ben did. Charlie was nice to look at, standing about five-ten and slender, with brown hair and hazel eyes. He was quick to smile and he made her feel ... well taken care of. Charlie was the safe choice - the typical "nice guy" that her mom and dad would approve of. They didn't know about any problems in the bedroom, of course.

They ate the rest of their dinner in near silence, both lost in their thoughts. Debi reached out and grabbed his hand at one point and said, "I just need time, okay?"

He nodded and flashed her a quick smile. "Sure."

Damnit! Now she was going to have to tell him the truth. Nothing else would do. How could she break his heart like that? She knew she could look far and wide to find another man who treated her as well as Charlie did. But how was she going to do it? She didn't like confrontations and this was going to be a doozy.

* * *

Charlie cursed himself. He should have known better than to put her on the spot like that! But she was so beautiful and she seemed to really like him. He always had this feeling she was out of his league, and yet, she kept hanging around. He made sure to treat her like a princess, because she deserved it. He knew she liked it - and his family's money didn't hurt, either. He worked for his dad's Philadelphia investment firm, in charge of the compliance department, but the section pretty much ran itself, giving him a lot of free time.

Charlie was aware he wasn't able to fully satisfy Debi in bed. He hoped she might overlook that part of their relationship. He had known since high school that his dick didn't measure up to others. It had been shocking to see the other boys in the shower room, with dicks of all shapes and sizes - most of them larger than his little guy. It made him feel inadequate.

He compensated by being extra nice to every girl who would go out with him. He managed to get a few dates in high school, although no girl ever slept with him. In college, when he was able to finally talk a girl into bed, it did not go well. They were generally polite when they saw what he wielded. But when he came too soon - which he often did - he knew he left them unsatisfied. They would drift away, giving him vague excuses as to why they could no longer see him.

He learned to accept his fate. It was just the way it was. He'd go online and check out some of the monster cocks being used like weapons on women and feel a small thrill, imagining it was him between her legs, giving her such pleasure that she screamed in delight. He thought he might have to live his life alone, just him and his computer porn, until he had met Debi.

She was a willowy blonde, with generous breasts and an athletic body. He couldn't believe his luck when she agreed to go out with him. They had both been seniors at Duke and shared an Econ class. It had taken most of the semester to get up the nerve to ask her out. He made sure to lavish her with small gifts and fancy meals while using his wits to entertain her. She had seemed flattered by all the attention. He purposely put off trying to get Debi into bed for weeks, fearing the inevitable let-down. When it finally happened, he could see the disappointment on her face, but she was polite enough not to make him feel bad. Like the other girls, she broke up with him, but they kept drifting back together. He knew she liked being treated so well and he enjoyed it too. It made him feel special to have her in his life.

After three years, he thought she had come to accept him, shortcomings and all, but this disaster of a proposal tonight made it clear she would never be satisfied with him. He could tell by her expression that she didn't want to hurt him and yet...

"Come on, I'll take you home." He paid the check and stood, forcing a smile on his face. He wondered what he'd tell his parents. He had already showed them the ring he bought. They had been so happy for him!

"Thanks, Charlie. The meal was great."

He nodded and helped her on with her coat. They left and he gave the valet his ticket and the man brought around his Lexus. Charlie helped Debi into the passenger seat, tipped the valet and climbed in behind the wheel.

"I didn't say no," she said as they started out. "I just need some time, that's all. It's quite sudden."

"It's okay," he told her. "I know what's on your mind."

"You do?"

"Look, I'm not ..." He stopped and tried again. "I know I don't satisfy you." He had to stop before his voice cracked.

"No! You do fine!" She said at once. Faint praise, indeed.

He waved a hand at her and stared out the windshield as he drove. "It's okay. There's not much I can do about it, so I've learned to live with it. You don't have to tiptoe around it."

She reached out and took his right hand into both of hers. "Charlie, you are the kindest man I know. You are so good to me - I feel your love every day."

"But it's not enough - I know." He blinked back tears and turned down the street toward her apartment. He paused. "Maybe we should have a tag-team marriage," he joked. It was closer to the truth than he dared admit.

"Don't make me feel like a jerk. I'm just trying to process it all. I haven't made up my mind yet."

"I know. You don't want to hurt my feelings. I appreciate it." He sighed again. "You know, if a woman is born flat-chested, she can get that fixed, but if a man..." he trailed off and shook his head.

Now Debi was fighting back tears, he could tell. He glanced over and saw her dab at her eyes. He felt sympathy for her.

"We're just star-crossed lovers, that's all," he said.

"No, we're not. I'm being selfish. I know it. I love you, Charlie. You have always treated me right. Not like most of the other guys I've dated!"

He nodded. He wondered if he had had a big dick, would he treat women like crap too? Maybe so, he mused. Maybe arrogance comes with having a large cock. Women would probably throw themselves at him so he wouldn't have to be nice. Wouldn't that be great!

He decided it was time to put his cards on the table. "Look, I know about Ben," he said.

She frowned. "Um, what do you mean? That he was my last boyfriend before you?"

"No, I know you've seen him ... since. It's all right." It made him feel funny to admit it to her. He dared not let on that it excited him in a perverse way. She would never understand that!

"Wait - how? I mean... Have you been spying on me?"

"No, I just spotted you guys coming out of a coffee shop, that's all." It was more than that. They had that "just fucked" looked about them. Maybe that's why he had sprung his marriage proposal on her - because he had been afraid he might lose her again.

"Uh... Um... I was just saying 'hi'."

"It's all right. I know you needed some release. I can understand that."

"You think ... we were fucking?"

"I would if I were you. I mean... once in a while, I figured... Just to keep sane, you know." That was as close as he dared go to admitting his peculiar fetish. She might think him strange.

She didn't have any response and they drove the rest of the way in silence. He parked the car in front of her apartment in Philadelphia's Prospect Park neighborhood and got out and came around to open her door. Even though his heart was breaking, he couldn't be rude to Debi. It wasn't her fault. He still wanted to treat her right. She climbed out and he walked her to her door. He gave her a gentle kiss on the lips and said, "Well, goodnight. I had a nice time, as always."

"Charlie, um, would you like to come in? I think we have more to talk about."

He smiled. "No thanks. You have a lot to think about and so do I." He turned and left her there, feeling her eyes on his back as he walked to the car.

"I'll call you tomorrow," she called out to him. He just nodded, a tight smile on his lips.

Back at his small guesthouse behind his parents' estate, Charlie was sorry he had told them of his plan to ask Debi to marry him. He knew they were waiting to hear, but he couldn't face them, not yet. Besides, he told himself, there was still a chance she'd say yes.

Yeah, sure.